(wearing: thrifted floral dress & green knit, Solemio lace wrap from Nastygal, backpack from Mexico)
Feels so nice to get back to posting (somewhat) regularly! I've really felt so scatterbrained lately, which has led to a lack in ability to produce a proper post. It seemed like every time I sat down to type something out, nothing was coming out right-or even made sense for that matter. And I am not going to force myself to post just to post. That is something I definitely would have done earlier on in blogging, but now I realize how redundant and counterproductive that is because the whole point is to publish something you are proud of, something that inspires you or shows a bit of who you are-not something forced and insincere. I was looking through some of my wayyy older posts the other day and I was thinking 'wow, I was trying way too god damn hard' and I really wanted to delete most of them because they are so far and away from what my blog has evolved into today..but then I stopped myself and realized; it's all a part of the process. It's kind of nice to look back and see how far I've come, how much I have let go, how open and honest I have become (mostly with myself..which is sometimes hardest of all).
I know I mentioned before I had a lot of life changes going on, but didn't really delve into what exactly those 'life changes' were. Well, reality is, we are all in a constant cycle of change and growth-even when we don't realize it. But sometimes, something unexpected comes into play and throws your balance and your whole way of being off. Some of you who have followed my blog for a while will know that I was in a serious relationship for four years. Well, let's just say things came to an abrupt halt and I was forced to really examine myself and my life and what I really want for my future. I won't share too many intimate details, but as hard as the adjustment has been, I see that it is all for the best. I am seeing things through a whole different perspective, and I am focusing more on myself and my own happiness than I have in as long as I can remember. I have been writing like crazy, spending quiet moments alone reading, getting lost in music. It's amazing how therapeutic and spirit lifting music is. Life is just so beautiful, and I want to experience it all. I want everything I wanted before, but in a different way and with a different sense of urgency.
Sorry for rambling, I am going to cut this short because I could literally go on for days.
dis gurlz got mo issuez den vogueeee hunnay boooboo chilllld
yep, went there.
Time to go journal and read at my favorite look out point...